Friday, 5 February 2021

Brainiacs Five

Flaming Stupid

I posted about a native American trying to light a cigarette with a petrol pump hose, thinking I wouldn't see anything more stupid for a while ...


.... but anything the Yanks can do, we can do better. Meet George Bostock of Bolton, Lancashire, England.

He managed to set fire to his family home after lighting his cigarette with a blowtorch. How he has survived this long on the planet is the only question I have.

Rick O'Shea

A rather stupid would be burglar in Maryland USA knocked himself out when he threw a brick at a window. The window failed to shatter and the brick ricocheted back and hit him in the face. Apparently this is actually fairly common as thieves underestimate the strength of toughened glass used in shops and cars these days .... a video shows an Irish car thief also knocking himself out with a brick.

Halfwit - Half Stupid

Jeremy Corbyn is not one for letting facts get in his way - the economy, Palestine, Press Freedoms, all have felt the full force of his ill informed opinions - so why should he suddenly change his approach when he was delayed on his way home from a Labour conference in Liverpool to London's Euston station.

He immediately tweeted "Couldn't make this up. We need public ownership of our railways." .... sadly for him it quickly emerged that the problem was a signalling problem caused by a Network Rail worker cutting a cable while strimming the grass. Network Rail is the publicly owned (nationalised) state part of the rail infrastructure.

He was swiftly put back in his box by other tweeters ..... One Twitter user wrote: "You do realise that the signalling already is nationalised?" Another said: "There already is public ownership of the signals, which is where the problem lies. Don't let pesky facts get in the way." .... another just called him "an idiot".

Abbey Whine

Some PC idiot urged the BBC not to record and episode of the Antique Road Show from Buckfast Abbey in Devon

Buckfast - A Morning Tonic For Some.

 .... for fear of endorsing its tonic wine. Scotland's alcoholics find the tonic to be the drink of choice aka the 'Buckfast Breakfast'. In England, its virtually unknown, except as a tonic beverage.

Nit Worth The Risk

Parents were urged not to treat their kids hair for nits near naked flames, for fear that their hair might catch flames ... Doh!!

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