Friday, 24 May 2019

Religious Writes

Jesus v Jedi

A Halloween party at Dundee University student union became a battle of faiths, as a man dressed as Jesus clashed with a man dressed as a Jedi Knight. The early morning fight broke out at 3am when the Jedi left the party, and was punched in the face by Jesus.

Who Would Win?

The Jedi was taken to hospital with a broken ankle sustained as he fell over .... police are searching for "a man in his mid 20s, about 5ft 10, with long brown hair, a beard and long robes" ..... could be anyone.

Say A Little Prayer

Reverend Kelvin Holdsworth, a provost of St Mary's cathedral in Glasgow, Scotland, has campaigned to secure same-sex marriage in the Scottish Episcopal churches, and in that spirit he wants Christians to prey for young Prince George to be a homosexual when he grows up. He wants the future King to be "blessed one day with the love of a fine young gentleman" ..... another cleric said it wasn't "a kind prayer. It is not a blessing. Its more like a curse from a fairytale. I would say its profoundly un-Christian" ..... They just can't stop destroying their own church can they?

Perfidious Priests

A survey by IPSO/MORI showed that trust in priests has fallen  to a new low. Of the 998 people questioned two thirds still trusted senior clerics to tell the truth, but this is a fall from a high of 85 per cent who trusted them to tell the truth in 1983. As might be expected, politicians came out with a low of just 17 per cent thinking they would tell the truth if asked. Government ministers rated just 19 per cent trust levels. Nurses got a trust rating of 94 per cent.  

Exorcising A Problem

Meanwhile, Father Pat Collins of the Catholic church in Ireland (and an exorcist), has called for more priests to be trained to perform exorcisms. He wants every diocese to have one or two trained 'ministers of deliverance and solemn exorcism'.

He believes that too many people are let down and abandoned by the church where this need arises. However his plea may be falling on deaf ears as the Catholic Communications Office in County Kildare said that exorcisms are very rare, and they were not aware of any carried out in recent years ... but then if no can do them, then there wouldn't be would there?

Organised Pagans

The Odinist Fellowship is apparently an organisation that represents pagans in the UK, and it was registered as a religious charity in 1988. They recently made the news when they wrote to the Archbishop of Canterbury requesting the return of two churches, to make amends for those of their pagan sites stolen 1,300 years ago by the church. So far, the request hasn't resulted in a site handover.

Tsar and Church

Vladimir Putin plunges into freezing water in lake Seliger, around 250 miles north of Moscow, as part of a traditional Orthodox Christian ritual which commemorates the baptism of Jesus at Epiphany ..... he wears a gold crucifix.


Iron Christian

He's a long way from the atheist KGB officer of 35 years ago. Church and Czar are now fully united in Russia.

St Asaph For The Trans-Gendered

An Anglican cathedral is the first in the country to have a gender Neutral toilet. St Asaph in Denbigh Wales is proud of being inclusive .... don't expect there are too many trans-gendered visitors to N Wales.

Last Supper

Richard Lussi from Pennsylvania USA was buried with his favourite food. Two Cheese-steaks ... make mine liver and onions.

God Is The Machine

The man who used to head Google's self-driving project, Anthony Levandowski, has set up his own religion called 'Way of the Future'.

God From The Machine

Its aim is "to develop and promote the realisation of a Godhead based on artificial intelligence".  ...... The sun burns very hot in California, and its best not to go out in it without a hat, is what I always say.

Christianity's Last Legs

As the UK falls slowly into the embrace of another creed, Christianity's inability to put up any resistance becomes evermore obvious. Little moments of fightback only highlight the decline. Take for instance the school nativity play. its already gone from those schools dominated by Asian pupils, especially where Islam is the only creed, but political correctness is doing for them elsewhere.
Best Donkey Costume Ever .......

A poll has uncovered that only one third of the UK's schools offer the traditional nativity play .... you know the one with the baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the Donkey (that was my character by the way). Bill Sawyer of Yarm Preparatory School in North Yorkshire said that banning Christian based plays to be politically correct was 'divisive' rather than inclusive, and called on more schools to bring them back. Mumsnet website also found that 47 per cent of schools offered an 'updated nativity' (which we have assume now includes other religions, or removes the Christian theme) .... Mr Sawyer said "It is incredibly sad" ..... I can only agree.

The Age Of The Amish

The Northwestern University has found that some members of the Amish community in Indiana USA, have a genetic mutation that can help them live up to a decade longer than those who don't have the same mutation. 

Dying For A Congregation

The average age of attendees of the Church of England is now more than 60 years of age. Its forecast that with this, and the continuing fall in attendees (especially under 30 years of age), the Church of England could easily be effectively dead within 40 years. Oh for that Amish gene ...

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