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Saturday, 7 February 2009

What The Romans Did For Us

Famously, according to Monty Pythons the People's Front of Judea, or is that the Judean People's Front (which one are the splitters?), or was it the Popular Front of Judea, had a discussion now known as "What have the Romans ever done for us?"

The Romans Did Quite A Lot For Us Actually

Reg: "They've bled us white, the bastards. They've taken everything we had, not just from us, from our fathers and from our fathers' fathers."
Stan: "And from our fathers' fathers' fathers."
Reg: "Yes."
Stan: "And from our fathers' fathers' fathers' fathers."
Reg: "All right, Stan. Don't labour the point. And what have they ever given us in return?"
Xerxes: "The aqueduct."
Reg: "Oh yeah, yeah they gave us that. Yeah. That's true."
Masked Activist: "And the sanitation!"
Stan: "Oh yes... sanitation, Reg, you remember what the city used to be like."
Reg: "All right, I'll grant you that the aqueduct and the sanitation are two things that the Romans have done... "
Matthias: "And the roads... "
Reg: "(sharply) Well yes obviously the roads... the roads go without saying. But apart from the aqueduct, the sanitation and the roads... "
Another Masked Activist: "Irrigation... "
Other Masked Voices: "Medicine... Education... Health..."
Reg: "Yes... all right, fair enough... "
Activist Near Front: "And the wine... "
Omnes: "Oh yes! True! "
Francis: "Yeah. That's something we'd really miss if the Romans left, Reg."
Masked Activist at Back: "Public baths!"
Stan: "And it's safe to walk in the streets at night now. "
Francis: "Yes, they certainly know how to keep order... (general nodding)... let's face it, they're the only ones who could in a place like this.(more general murmurs of agreement)"
Reg: "All right... all right... but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order... what have the Romans done for us? "
Xerxes: "Brought peace! "
Reg: "(very angry, he's not having a good meeting at all) What!? Oh... (scornfully) Peace, yes... shut up! "

However according to this article, it was the language, and the tradition of discourse and civilised debate which is their true heritage to the world.

When you look at those areas that don't share that heritage, you can see that they may have a point.

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