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Friday 7 February 2020

Loopy Laura

Laura Lowes is at just 30 years of age, a mother, and already a low(ish) level career criminal, of the type that we seem to produce more and more of these days ....

Laura Is No Criminal Mastermind
Laura Is No Criminal Mastermind ....

.... she has already been convicted of 73 criminal offences (including some for violence), and shows little sign of slowing down, or getting any brighter.

Her latest escapade showed a marked ramp up in her criminal activities and threat level, while continuing to exhibit no increase in intelligence. Number 74 on her list of crimes, was when she and a male accomplice robbed a takeaway delivery driver of his £200 takings and food from his car, during a robbery in Byker, Newcastle, England.

What made this crime stand out from her previous efforts, was that it was her who pointed the gun at a takeaway driver's face, while her companion held a knife to the victim's torso, while they both were shouting 'where's the money, give me the money'. Not unnaturally any thoughts of resistance left the victim, and he handed over all his money from his jeans pocket, as well the takeaway meal that he had been attempting to deliver.

However, as this stolen meal was in fact the same £44 meal that the two masterminds had ordered from the Blue Sea takeaway in Wallsend, in order to ambush the driver, and she had ordered the takeaway from her own phone via the Just Eat app, it didn't take Sherlock Holmes to track her down. Newcastle police duly contacted Just Eat, who confirmed the order had been placed using a mobile phone and gave the police a number.

Further inquires revealed that that mobile phone was linked to the email address of one Laura Lowes, and also gave her home address .... she was arrested. In court she admitted robbery, but the gun (whether real or fake), has not been recovered. Her defending counsel said Lowes had a "poor start" in life, and her offending is linked to drug use, he added that the robbery was not her idea and added she became involved through "naivety". .... I guess that also goes for the previous 73 offences?

Judge Sarah Mallett sentenced Lowes to four years behind bars with a two year extended licence period, and said in something of an understatement that there is a "significant risk" of her committing further offences and causing harm to people. I fail to see how the significant risk of her committing further offences with violence is going to be diminished in any way in the two years she will spend in prison ... its this sort of useless sentencing that lets these sorts of criminals just spiral out of control, revolving through the system, time and time again until finally someone is seriously hurt.

Her previous 73 offences, some with violence, and all with lenient sentences, have led her to escalate to armed robbery .... she is only left with murder to complete the set ... but hopefully not. On a serious note, although she is laughably inept and gets caught regularly, as do many others with these sort of conviction numbers, I sometimes think that we have just accepted a decline in to an ever broken Britain.

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